I’m still getting calls from the media about the stabbing last week of Virginia state senator Creigh Deeds by his son, Gus, who later committed suicide. The emphasis has changed from outrage about a shortage of treatment beds to questions about family violence. Talking about violence always gets tricky. No one wants to increase stigma so I’m careful to point out that individuals with mental disorders are more likely to be victims than perpetrators.
Still, violence inside families is a reality. A poll of National Alliance on Mental Illness family members found that 39% had been threatened by an ill family member or had their property destroyed. A similar poll of NAMI members in Massachusetts found that 50% of families had to cope with violent behavior. In 80 percent of cases where someone became violent, it was the parent who was the victim.
I was happy to hear over the weekend an interview on National Public Radio’s Weekend Edition with Gary Mihelish about his adult son who lives with a schizophrenia. I first met Gary when he invited me to speak in Helena at a NAMI convention. It was one of my first speeches and Gary was kind enough to treat me during my visit to a historical tour followed by a buffalo steak! Gary did a fantastic job in the NPR interview, not sensationalizing violence but discussing it candidly and also talking about his son’s recovery. It is easy to understand why Gary was awarded NAMI’s highest honor for his years of service locally in Montana and also nationally by serving on the NAMI board.